Of Course . . .

My assistant freaked out, and I had to run into work for a couple of hours this morning just to pull everything together.

Nothing serious – she just becomes overwhelmed very easily. Damsel in Distress Syndrome, and all that.

No, I did not get to participate in the hiring process. Human Resources loves her, and insists she has experience, etc. My only question is why don’t I get interviews with this level of HR perkiness and trust?

Anyway, from an actual conversation in the break room:

Y (crying): Boo, hoo, hoo! We are so understaffed! I can’t do everything all by myself, and they are going to fire me for not having everything done!”

Me: Breathe. Deep breath through your nose. Let it out slowly through your mouth. Again.

Y: Boo, hoo, hoo, hoo, HOO!

Me: Deep breath – hold it. And out.

Me: Nobody is going to fire you. They know you are missing four people per shift. It’s okay. Talk to X (who is sitting across the table from her grinning like an idiot) – he’s the happiest person on the planet.

X: Me? Oh, I have a happy place. Just find your happy place and breathe!

Y: Boo, hoo, hoo! I don’t have a happy place!

X: Everybody has a happy place! (eyes me critically) Except your happy place has an active volcano, doesn’t it?

Me: Don’t forget the dancing animal friends . . .